Weight Loss Surgery Update 9/16/2011: Up, Down, Up, Down... EH!

This photo is a perfect sample of what I'm feeling!  I've been overeating since the day I received bad news about my weight loss surgery.  I feel as heavy as a train and off-track.  Huh, maybe it's just me but I can't shake these blues!  Maybe I need to see that shrink now.

Good morning:)  (I'm smiling as I remember what dad would say every time someone would tell him that, "what the HELL is so good about it?")  Many of you have been very kind and concerned about how my weight loss surgery procedure is going.  Thank you for asking but I've been off-track since Sept. 2nd, the day I went to see the Bariatric Medicine Inst. in SLC.

 I’m at the step before Square One.  Ugh, YES it’s very frustrating!!  I am currently eating EVERYTHING and ANYTHING!  From my first appointment when the doc said I had a liver condition that may prevent me from making it through the surgery to when the insurance agent said my insurance won’t cover the Gastric Sleeve, I was very discouraged-- I ate compulsively.  And I’ve probably gained 20lbs!  I’m pissed and I eat when I'm pissed, sad, happy, in love, you get the picture!  (Sorry, but I am)

I was hoping with all my heart that it would be an easy, in-and-out, procedure but I guess not.  I’m almost tempted to save some money up and run away to Mexico to have the procedure done—almost!  Except for one small detail, I may be the .0001% that dies on the operating table. 

I haven’t stopped research on the subject though and thanks to what I found today while searching the web, I’m even more frustrated.  Did you know that, “... bariatric surgery patients experience remission of type 2 diabetes within days of having surgery…”?  That makes me sick!  I would be in remission TODAY!!  Boy, do I HATE diabetes!!!

But wait, my post isn't all self-pity... I watched a documentary on Netflix.com the other night called, “Heavy”.  It was AWESOME!  A guy weighing over 600lbs. ate better and exercised.  In just under two months, he was able to lose almost 200lbs.  WOW!  Do you know what that could do for me?  I would feel so much better—I’d probably be rid of diabetes for good!  I think I should try to be positive and get back on track ASAP!  I wish I was more optimistic, I could've lost 20lbs. instead of gained.    

Oh well, I know exactly what I have to do.  In fact, I’ve been told for the past 12 years of my life each time I went to visit a doc, stayed in the hospital, by friends and neighbors even.  Ugh, okay here’s to a new week… starting Monday!  Haha.  I will keep you posted, I have to, you’re my support team!

Thanks for reading [my sad story]!

Love Always, Faga